Bath night of shame
Friday 1 June 2007
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Limping Toulouse mayor Jean-Luc Moudenc (©AFP)
Fans of Toulouse mayor Jean-Luc Moudenc had some nervous moments recently after he was injured in Ligue 1 action ahead of his crucial fixture with the local electorate on 10 June.
J'acuzzi Elie Baup
The 46-year-old (centre-) right winger picked up the injury in Toulouse FC's post-match celebrations after a victory against neighbours FC Girondins de Bordeaux secured a first-ever berth in the UEFA Champions League third qualifying round. Moudenc entered the changing rooms and, in the sort of jape that can so often get out of hand, was thrown into the Jacuzzi - only to emerge limping with what was later diagnosed as a fractured ankle. Coach Elie Baup said: "During the season, he said that he would run naked around the training camp should we finish on the podium. We just reminded him of his promise. We also did this for him." Now on crutches with the local elections only two weeks away, Moudenc said: "It is just a bit annoying for my election campaign. But it does not tarnish my joy to see my city in Europe."
Cup runneth over
Speaking of excessive celebrations, Moudenc will be able to empathise with the Russian Cup, won last week by FC Lokomotiv Moskva. An extra-time goal from Garry O'Connor secured the big pot for the Railwayman, but as the victorious players filled it with champagne, the crystal base snapped off. However, it seems Lokomotiv are not to blame. A source at the Russian Football Union, who retrieved the trophy from holders PFC CSKA Moskva a month ago, said: "One of our employees noticed the crack in the base of the cup. But we decided not to claim anything against CSKA, because it's not known when the defect actually occurred. The cup was made in 2001 and since then it had been with four clubs - Lokomotiv in 2001, FC Spartak Moskva in 2003, FC Terek Chechenskaya Respublika in 2004 and CSKA in 2002, 2005 and 2006. We wanted to repair the trophy, but decided to do it after the final. Who would have thought that the cup would not be able to survive the winners' celebrations?"
From the lime to the ridiculous
At this point, we would like to reassure readers that the European Champion Clubs' Cup is safe and intact with AC Milan, just as it would have been had it ended up in the secure hands of Pepe Reina. Though perhaps not his nervous father, himself a former goalkeeper, who was interviewed on Spanish television before the final and admitted that he had taken some tranquillisers and drunk a large quantity of lime tea before arriving at the ground. "I wish him the best," said Reina senior. "And I hope my granddaughter is a good omen." Indeed the three-month-old Reina offspring was present, though her name Grecia - the Spanish for Greece - unaccountably failed to bring Liverpool FC luck.
Becks where he belongs
With David Beckham back in the England lineup, it is time to lift our week-long moratorium on stories about the bleached bombshell, which almost certainly proved the decisive factor in provoking his recall. Firstly, Becks has insisted that his current hairstyle, which has reportedly led him to be nicknamed 'Marilyn' in the Madrid dressing room, did not cost a fortune. "My friend does my haircuts," Beckham said. "That's been one thing that's been said over the years, that I've paid like five grand for a haircut. And I'm like, 'Seriously, my mate does it for free'." Meanwhile, perhaps it was not a brief hiatus in Beckham featuring in Off the Ball that brought him back into international football, but rather a campaign by Pirates of the Caribbean actor Bill Nighy. "I wrote to David to say I thought it was unfortunate he was no longer part of the England set-up... let's just say I was confused by the decision and thought I'd like to disassociate myself from it," said Nighy, adding to our 'thanks for sharing that with us' files.
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