No joy for famous Nürnberg joker

The dry humour of 1. FC Nürnberg coach Hans Meyer has been tested by a miserable season as the German side start their UEFA Cup Group A campaign against Everton FC.

Dismal results
The German Cup holders' defence ended last week with a defeat by second division strugglers FC Carl Zeiss Jena – the team Meyer famously led to the final of the 1980/81 UEFA Cup Winners' Cup, later boasting "back in 1981 we beat world class teams with a selection of district players". In addition, a 1-0 loss at home to VfB Stuttgart at the weekend marked Meyer's 65th birthday and left his side in the Bundesliga relegation zone.

Injury ravages
"We have the same problems that have been troubling us all season, and they will go on until Christmas," Meyer said. "With [defender] Horacio Pínola and [forward] Róbert Vittek injured, we are missing two key players, and their replacements Lars Jacobsen and Ralf Schmidt have also both been injured. Then we have had other injuries to Peer Kluge, Ivan Saenko and Jawhar Mnari. Nürnberg are not the sort of club that can cope with these absences."

Special skills
Meyer is a legend in Germany for his barbed humour and coaching prowess. He made his name in the former East Germany, taking charge of Jena at the age of just 29. Unlike many of his East German peers, he was able to transfer his skills successfully into the Bundesliga after reunification, due to his ability to create competitive squads on tiny budgets.

Mönchengladbach success
There was scepticism when he was offered his first big job in the west of the country with VfL Borussia Mönchengladbach in 1999. When he arrived, Mönchengladbach had just been relegated to the second division, but Meyer proved his worth. He became the first East German trainer to lead any club into the Bundesliga in 2000/01, before a dispute with local tabloid newspapers prompted his resignation in March 2003.

'I am back'
He was not out of work for long, being hired to save Hertha BSC Berlin from relegation that December. Meyer duly steered them to a 12th place finish and was offered a contract at the end of the 2003/04 campaign only to refuse, the one-time FC Rot-Weiss Erfurt and Chemnitzer FC boss claiming he wanted to retire to his rose garden.

Good results
However, Nürnberg tempted him out of retirement in November 2005, Meyer announcing his return with the line: "My wife won't let me do the gardening anymore since I can't tell roses from cauliflower, so I am back." The side have finished eighth and sixth in their two seasons under Meyer, and are back in Europe for the first time in nine years. They are now enduring a difficult time but a win against Everton will put smiles back on the fans' faces.

The wit and wisdom of Hans Meyer:
"We had to stop training because some players were so overwhelmed with joy, they started to cry."
After being offered a new deal by a former club.

"In my optimism, which knows no bounds, I expected [FC] Bayern [München] to offer me a job a day or two after the Berlin wall came down."
On German reunification

"Now we are top; we will stay here."
After a 3-0 win on the opening day of last season left Nürnberg top of the Bundesliga

"If you are a professional footballer, you live with that everywhere you go. Try visiting the theatre after losing three matches in a row – you are the one spoiling everyone else's night."
On dealing with fame

"They are quick to build a monument to you in football, but they are also quick to urinate on it."
On the fleeting nature of success

"Only fourth placed? I am quite disappointed. I couldn't sleep the entire night. I have been lying there, asking myself for hours what the reason might be."
After being voted as Germany's fourth-best coach behind Jürgen Klinsmann, Thomas Doll and Jürgen Klopp

"He once came into our dressing room after a match wanting to swap jersies. I told him that he couldn't have one because he would get plenty of them next season. He did not laugh. No sense of humour – he failed my test."
On why he did not sign midfielder Daniel Felgenhauer

"Well, he certainly looks much more interesting now."
On a player who broke his nose